Sometimes our children are so filled with adrenaline during a burst of emotion that it takes their neurochemistry a minute to reset. Their brain is triggered and they are not able yet to be calm enough to be comforted.
They need us to pause and stay calm and not take their reaction personally.
They WILL calm down if you give them compassion and time.
In this video, the speaker discusses "Compassionate Transportation," a technique for safely and empathetically getting children to cooperate when they are overwhelmed by emotions and immediate actions are necessary.
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In this video, the speaker discusses time outs from a perspective based on attachment research, emphasizing the importance of taking breaks to help reset our brains when we are dysregulated and the need for calm co-regulation rather than isolating with shame or pain as a lesson, adding that the lesson we want to teach is that our bodies need breaks sometimes to calm down so our brains can make good, safe choices - and this lesson applies to marriages as well!
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Join your child in their delight and communicate to them that their instincts and preferences are valuable and valid - this is key in developing their self-esteem, and play is the perfect context for learning and bonding.
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