It is developmentally normal for small children to struggle with impulse control and to hit, pinch, push, grab etc.
But the experience of being hit, pinched, pushed, grab etc is painful at any stage of development.
When another child is doing these things to your child is can be incredibly triggering and hard to navigate (esp if the other parent is not intervening and is a friend or acquaintance).
Remember that these are moments to teach your children 2 things:
1. Body ownership and permission to set boundaries with people who hurt them
2. That you care about their pain and will calmly but firmly protect them from people that are using hurtful hands or words
The idea of toughening up your children to deal with the world only makes you their first bully, stripping them of their sense of belonging with you; treat your children with respect and connection so that they instinctively protect themselves from unkind and cruel treatment.
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Learn how to navigate parenting with a partner who is not on the same page as you when it comes to attachment-focused parenting in this enlightening video that emphasizes the importance of starting with connection, collaboration, and modeling instead of trying to persuade or degrade your partner's way of doing things, and seeking support if your partner is abusive.
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In this video, you'll learn that a securely attached young child expresses their distress, seeks proximity to their caregiver, and calms quickly, and that this pattern of express-seek-soothe can be seen throughout our lifespan, with teens seeking friends, adults seeking romantic partners or close friends, but always involving the freedom to have an emotional need, be close, and receive comfort at every stage of life.
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