When we are unable to reach our children through gentle and respectful requests (aka we ask nicely 16 times for something and it isn't happening), there is a temptation to pivot to harshness, threats, and punishments to motivate them.
Unfortunately, when we go that route, our behavior adds tension and fear into the learning process and limits the amount of our children's brains that are online.
Instead of turning the volume up on fear and punishment, turn the volume up on playfulness.
When we are playful we engage our child's whole brain. It makes learning easier and deeper. Plus you have more fun too.
(Costumes not required)
A message to all fathers: keep going with your efforts to connect with your children because they desperately need to see what a healthy, connected, caring male looks like, and it will create a secure attachment that fosters resilience.
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In this video, Dr. Laura Markham shares practical tips on how to help kids and parents manage boredom by staying in a place of compassionate teaching, which involves expressing empathy, helping kids notice body sensations, developing the habit of seeing boredom as an unidentified need state, being patient, and teaching kids to discover their own options without collapsing into despair.
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In this video, the speaker discusses the challenges of managing anger when recovering from a childhood where anger was out of control, but emphasizes that anger is a normal and necessary feeling, and our children need empathy and support to learn how to manage it, rather than being labeled as abusive. Additionally, the speaker suggests seeking care to separate past trauma responses from present situations for both yourself and your children's wellbeing.
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