Three tips for navigating the tricky moments and conversations that happen in every relationship....
1. You can acknowledge the tension and dynamics before you are ready to solve them...sometimes just acknowledging disconnection relieves the bigness of it.
2. Communicate your confidence in your relationship and your ability to figure it out when the time is right. "This is hard but I believe in us and know we will figure it out together".
3. Take a copious amount of time to actively listen to the other person's perspective and needs. Do this with an open heart and body state. You don't have to agree to truly hear someone.
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The myth that comforting your child will "spoil" them is not only emotionally harmful but also creates an altered brain state that leads to higher levels of stress and mental illness in adulthood, giving them compassion and comfort will only help them develop a healthier brain function.
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In this video, Dr. Laura Markham shares practical tips on how to help kids and parents manage boredom by staying in a place of compassionate teaching, which involves expressing empathy, helping kids notice body sensations, developing the habit of seeing boredom as an unidentified need state, being patient, and teaching kids to discover their own options without collapsing into despair.
Model for them your own consent process, and help them deeply understand the nuance of desire
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