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Helping children learn honesty is a huge part of them developing a secure experience with us. But it's less about extinguishing lying and more about creating an environment for them to feel safe being open with us.
Three tips for helping create that environment:
1. Recognize and manage your own anxiety and any impulse to use honesty as a way to control your children. Honesty and pressure to perform don't mix easily.
2. Understand that lying is developmentally normal and has a wide range of variance. Don't treat all lies as psychopathic impulses. Teach and validate their wide ranging nuances.
3. Remember that honesty flourishes where messiness is understood and given empathy.
Learn how to foster secure attachment with your child by being a consistently responsive and connection-focused parent, and don't beat yourself up for not being perfect - the important thing is to focus on repairing and staying dedicated to the relationship.
Discover evidence-based techniques for helping children process traumatic events in a healthy way, including encouraging them to tell their story and avoiding avoidance, with guidance from expert Dr. Dan Siegel and clinical experience.
Learn three simple techniques to help you reset and reconnect with your children when you reach your breaking point as a parent, including taking a time out, having a silly tantrum, and taking a silent hug reset.