We are not in control of the relationships between our children and their siblings, but we are in control of how we communicate about those relationships and whether or not our stuff gets in the way of them. Like so many other things in parenting the key to helping our children build healthy dynamics with each other is in our ability to be present, calm, accepting of all the emotions and to use connection tools to model and teach socially effective ways of relating. Not all siblings are destined to be bff's, BUT if we offer a secure environment, no siblings have to be at great odds with one another. Yes, there will be seasons of discord and moments of conflict, but if we can contain our own anxiety about those times, it leaves our kids free to figure out their relationships without pressure or burden from us.
Teaching healthy conflict resolution to our children means modeling it for them, which requires communicating and connecting through conflict without fighting dirty or being violent.
Discover the importance of connection and presence in parenting, and how modeling rather than molding can help build a strong and resilient relationship with your children in this heartwarming and insightful video.
The most helpful way for a child to understand boundaries is to model it for them, and as parents, we should also honor some of our children's boundaries as well to protect connection and safety, not power.