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Human beings are wired to co-regulate. Which means that closeness to other people when we are in distress helps our nervous systems to calm and reset.
The words "come here" or "I am here" when used with gentleness and compassion are deeply soothing and can help our loved ones know that their emotional needs are not a burden to us.
In this video, the speaker shares how their mother broke the cycle of attachment trauma by letting go of guilt and control, leading to a loving and secure relationship that transcended generations of abuse.
Learn how to set compassionate limits with your child in a way that benefits their brain development and reduces reactive responses to emotions, with the timing varying depending on factors such as age, hunger, and consistency.
The difference between calm and gentle teaching and permissiveness when addressing problematic behavior in children can be confusing, but punishing a child for their mistakes does not teach them emotional and behavioral maturity; instead, being respectful and patient in drawing boundaries and limits is more effective in teaching children the right way to handle difficult situations.