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Reminder: As parents, we can get into a "no" state that is affecting our kids ability to co-regulate with us. We might be overstimulated, exhausted, or just flooded with all the things that need our attention. So we restort to a relational reactivity of annoyance and intolerance to our children's requests.
While it may seem counterintuitive, sometimes you need to find a yes you can offer to reconnect with your children so that the whole vibe of the environment shifts.
You don't have to say yes to the things you really need to hold a boundary on (no child, you still cannot put your hand in the hot pan), but find a little give (would you like to rinse the noodles in the sink when they are done?) and watch the magic when you find another way to say yes.
When you pause and find a yes you're saying yes to connection, and co regulation and finding a moment to connect amidst the 17bagillion tasks we are juggling our way through.
In this video, learn why it's important to focus on soothing and supporting kids' emotions before trying to teach them, as strong emotions take energy away from the brain's thinking and processing areas, and how you can use co-regulation and language to help them grow once they've calmed down. Remember to "Connect before you correct," as Dr. Karyn Purvis said.
In this video, the speaker discusses teaching children to be socially capable while also recognizing and speaking out against abusive power dynamics, rejecting the notion that respect equals compliance and emphasizing the importance of paying attention and setting boundaries.
The most helpful way for a child to understand boundaries is to model it for them, and as parents, we should also honor some of our children's boundaries as well to protect connection and safety, not power.