1.

Restraint Collapse: Aka Why Your Children Fall Apart After a Day Away from You

No items found.

Kids hold it together during the day at school and camp and daycare and grandma's house because they instinctively trust you to hold their tenderest emotional states. It's called RESTRAINT COLLAPSE.

Your attachment relationship is the place they feel the most comfortable expressing their strong feelings.

So many things happen during their days that they don't have the time or the secure place to feel and process, so those things come out at the end of the day with you.

But not always directly. Sometimes they go sideways about something seemingly small because they just don't have executive functioning skills to connect their emotional state to something that happened hours before.

When your kids get home and start melting down, offer them compassion and a safe place to be emotionally messy. And a protein snack. And be kind to yourself, you're not failing, you're their safe place.

!7maZdGQE

Join the Attachment Nerd Herd

Complete access for $29

Similar to what you just watched

Feelings and Behavior
01:26

In this video, the speaker discusses how children experience grief differently than adults, and how their feelings of loss and powerlessness may manifest through tantrums, whining, or anger, emphasizing the importance of reaching out to support children during times of transition and change.

View
Modeling Examples
00:49

In this video, you'll learn that how you live is the biggest teaching tool in your toolkit, as humans are wired to learn through watching and imitating, rather than through directions or instructions.

View
The Neuroscience of What Harsh Punishment Does to a Child
01:28

Discover why harsh punishments and power and control tactics can create compliance in children through fear and dissociative shutdown, and how these patterns can lead to adult relationships based on power and control or deep self-worth wounds in this eye-opening and insightful video that encourages compassionate limit setting without instilling fear.

View