1.
Your kids are doing the best they can.
When we tease them for struggling it puts a wound in their self concept and in our relationship with them.
Even if we are truly joking because it's socially acceptable and maybe our parents did it with us, it's truly risky because we don't know how it will land. There are lots of other things to be funny about that don't hold the potential to be emotionally abusive.
I see parents do this thinking it's harmless. Unfortunately it can be deeply hurtful to say that your child will one day see how awful they were by having a child as awful as them.
Parenting is hard sometimes, but our kids don't need to feel guilty about that.
If you've already done this, own it and apologize...we all make mistakes, then when we know better, we do better. Just like we are asking our children.
Avoid focusing too much on fairness when teaching kids, as it can create a belief that good behavior is always rewarded and bad behavior is always punished, leading to the dangerous belief that they deserve any trauma they experience, instead use relational motivation to guide them towards making good choices.
In this Q&A video, Alicia Malnati shares three tips to help your children love learning for the sake of learning, including setting challenging but attainable goals, emphasizing effort over innate ability, and praising specific tactics rather than traits.
Discover why natural consequences are great teachers for children, especially those with neurodivergent conditions like ADHD and Autism, and why guiding and teaching instead of punishing and preaching is a more effective approach to helping your child learn to listen to and trust their bodies, in this enlightening video on interoception and attachment.