1.
Your kids are doing the best they can.
When we tease them for struggling it puts a wound in their self concept and in our relationship with them.
Even if we are truly joking because it's socially acceptable and maybe our parents did it with us, it's truly risky because we don't know how it will land. There are lots of other things to be funny about that don't hold the potential to be emotionally abusive.
I see parents do this thinking it's harmless. Unfortunately it can be deeply hurtful to say that your child will one day see how awful they were by having a child as awful as them.
Parenting is hard sometimes, but our kids don't need to feel guilty about that.
If you've already done this, own it and apologize...we all make mistakes, then when we know better, we do better. Just like we are asking our children.
Parenting can be hard. You want to do everything you can to make your kid feel worthy, but sometimes it feels like you're just not sure what to do. Luckily, dogs offer some great advice!
Learn about the concept of Restraint Collapse and how children rely on their attachment relationship to express their emotions in this insightful video, which provides tips on how to offer compassion and a safe space for your kids to release their emotional tensions after holding it together all day.
Avoid focusing too much on fairness when teaching kids, as it can create a belief that good behavior is always rewarded and bad behavior is always punished, leading to the dangerous belief that they deserve any trauma they experience, instead use relational motivation to guide them towards making good choices.