Your kids NEED you to connect with the adults in your life.
I know this can seem the opposite when they cling to your leg as you leave them with a babysitter for an evening night out with your partner or with your friends.
But it is vital to their health. Because you are their most influential model on these two things:
1. How they should treat others
2. How others should treat them
So they are watching you and looking for a template on close mature relationships. You can't care for them fully without also caring for your own attachment needs.
Esp because you will unconsciously expect them to meet your needs if you aren't doing it yourself.
You deserve close, caring spaces to be given love with the other adults in your life, and so does your partner or close friends.
investing in your adult relationships IS investing in your kids.
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The myth that comforting your child will "spoil" them is not only emotionally harmful but also creates an altered brain state that leads to higher levels of stress and mental illness in adulthood, giving them compassion and comfort will only help them develop a healthier brain function.
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In this video, you'll learn about the three phases of healing - reflection, grieving, and growth - that those who did not inherit a secure attachment style can work through in order to learn and earn a secure attachment style.
Learn about the concept of Restraint Collapse and how children rely on their attachment relationship to express their emotions in this insightful video, which provides tips on how to offer compassion and a safe space for your kids to release their emotional tensions after holding it together all day.
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