When we are asking our children to change their behavior or understand the impact of their behavior we are creating neural patterns for them.
If we use punishment we are creating shame, fear and pain connections to the experience of being asked to change or grow.
These neural networks then get activated in other relationships making it hard to be receptive to change or to feedback from people in our lives.
When we use teaching focused methods instead of control focused methods our children can learn without feeling yucky about growth.
Gentle teaching doesn't make weaker adults, it makes calmer more centered adults.
Check out "no drama discipline" by Dan Siegel , or peaceful parent happy kids by Dr Laura Markum for ideas on how to teach without punishment
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In this video, learn about the risk of relapse for individuals who have been abusive in the past, and the confusion surrounding whether someone has truly changed, as well as the importance of recognizing true change, moving on, and being aware of the signs of abuse.
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Teaching healthy conflict resolution to our children means modeling it for them, which requires communicating and connecting through conflict without fighting dirty or being violent.
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Join your child in their delight and communicate to them that their instincts and preferences are valuable and valid - this is key in developing their self-esteem, and play is the perfect context for learning and bonding.
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