1.

Instead of Punishing through Time Outs, Regulate through Taking a Break

No items found.

Lots of folks ask me about time outs...

My answer is based on attachment research (predictable me😂).

Taking breaks is hugely important to help our brains reset when we are dysregulated. So YES to the reset and break part of a time out.

But we're adding to their dysregulation if we are trying to teach them by isolating them with shame or pain as a lesson.

Our nervous systems do best when we have calm people lovingly helping us to reset. (co-regulation).

The lesson we want them to learn is "our bodies need breaks sometimes to calm down so our brains can calmly make good safe choices.

Works for marriages too!

‍

!7maZdGQE

Join the Attachment Nerd Herd

Complete access for $29

Similar to what you just watched

When Your Child Does Not Want to go to School
01:12

Learn how to support your kids through the emotional rollercoaster of going to school, especially on tough Mondays, by holding boundaries, offering comfort, and staying compassionate during the transition process.

View
Your Kids Don't Owe You Anything
01:02

In this video, the speaker shares how their mother broke the cycle of attachment trauma by letting go of guilt and control, leading to a loving and secure relationship that transcended generations of abuse.

View
Please Don’t Use the “Polishing My Shotgun” Approach to Protection
01:03

As parents, we want to protect our children from harm, but threats of violence may not be the best way to do so. Instead, we can be a refuge and a barrier for our children, offering comfort and support in times of need.

View