One of the most important roles we play in our children's lives is the role of assisting with emotional regulation.
Because their brains are still developing they need to borrow our calmness and groundedness when they are emotionally flooded.
This is FAR easier said than done. Especially if you are highly sensitive or if you are an abuse survivor.
Remember these three things to help you stay calm and available to your kids:
1. It's not my job to make their feelings go away, it's my job to teach them about their feelings and how to feel them
2. What I felt BEFORE their meltdown is my body state, I can return to that and still care about their feelings (differentiation)
3. All feelings pass
Hang in there parents, the more you do this the easier it gets!!
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In this video, the speaker discusses time outs from a perspective based on attachment research, emphasizing the importance of taking breaks to help reset our brains when we are dysregulated and the need for calm co-regulation rather than isolating with shame or pain as a lesson, adding that the lesson we want to teach is that our bodies need breaks sometimes to calm down so our brains can make good, safe choices - and this lesson applies to marriages as well!
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In this video, you'll learn that hovering over our kids to protect them is not the best form of protection, as they need us to be connected with them so they can come to us as a refuge, and that the best protection we can offer them is connection.
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In this video, you'll learn why investing time in a connected approach to parenting when your kids are young can lead to a beautiful relationship with your children and less time repairing broken trust in the future.
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