Kids don't gain perspective by being told that they are overreacting. That is how kids learn whether or not their emotional state matters to others.
Kids learn perspective thru the process of being given the opportunity to feel their feelings.
As a child develops, they are able to feel in their bodies the difference between small and big grief which helps them to notice that some things are smaller than others in emotional terms.
When a child is crying over any disappointment, they need you to help them understand their pain and grief so that they can learn how to surf it. Dismissing it gives them no tools. AND it sends the message that their pain is not worthy of attention, which leaves them ill equipped when bigger grief comes later on in life.
When your kid feels grief over something "small", remember your job is to teach them how to feel their feelings and to show them that relationships are a safe place to feel them. The ability to process perspective will come as they grow.
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Discover why responding attentively to your young children won't make them weak, self-centered and dependent adults, as research shows that emotional attunement and responsiveness from caregivers helps children feel safe and develop better awareness and focus in relationships, whereas ignoring their emotional needs leads to heightened fear states that make it hard for them to learn the nuances of relationships - check out the recommended studies to learn more and trust your instincts for care.
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The most helpful way for a child to understand boundaries is to model it for them, and as parents, we should also honor some of our children's boundaries as well to protect connection and safety, not power.
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In this video, learn about the importance of timing when teaching children how to regulate their emotions, and why it's essential to wait until they have calmed down before offering guidance.
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