When we say "use your words" during an emotional moment, we are trying to help our children come to a place of regulation. Unfortunately we are using a tool that they cannot access at that moment.
The reason they are not using their words, is because the language centers of the brain are being flooded with reactionary neurochemistry. Which means that hearing instructions via language isn't going to work either.
Instead, communicate with your non-verbal presence so that your child can FEEL your support to help their brain regain a sense of calm and connectedness.
After the emotional flooding has subsided and their thinking brain is above water again, they will be much more capable of using their words and helping you understand what was happening for them.
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In this video, you'll learn that while it's developmentally normal for small children to struggle with impulse control and physical aggression, it's important to teach your child about body ownership, setting boundaries, and protecting them from hurtful behavior, especially in situations where the other parent is not intervening.
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Discover how to set limits lovingly and effectively to teach small children to hear and understand the boundaries in compassionate ways, instead of punishing or upping the ante, in this insightful video that emphasizes the importance of avoiding power battles and teaching children that they have the power to grow and learn from their experiences.
This video is about limbic resonance, which is when your feeling brain is lined up with someone else's feeling brain, and you feel connected.
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