Grief is disorienting for adults, and we have fully formed prefrontal lobes. For kids it is impossible to process directly.
Instead it comes out sideways and in the indescribable feelings of lostness and powerlessness.
Kids in grief and transition and change are often more whiney or tantrum prone or angry. They are feeling the grief but without the capacity to link it to the narrative.
When a kid is acting out more than normal, reach out instead of clamping down, you might be surprised how much sense their feelings make when put into context.
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In this video, learn why it's important to focus on soothing and supporting kids' emotions before trying to teach them, as strong emotions take energy away from the brain's thinking and processing areas, and how you can use co-regulation and language to help them grow once they've calmed down. Remember to "Connect before you correct," as Dr. Karyn Purvis said.
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In this video, the speaker discusses the challenges of managing anger when recovering from a childhood where anger was out of control, but emphasizes that anger is a normal and necessary feeling, and our children need empathy and support to learn how to manage it, rather than being labeled as abusive. Additionally, the speaker suggests seeking care to separate past trauma responses from present situations for both yourself and your children's wellbeing.
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Discover why responding attentively to your young children won't make them weak, self-centered and dependent adults, as research shows that emotional attunement and responsiveness from caregivers helps children feel safe and develop better awareness and focus in relationships, whereas ignoring their emotional needs leads to heightened fear states that make it hard for them to learn the nuances of relationships - check out the recommended studies to learn more and trust your instincts for care.
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