If you grow up in a home where dominance is valued, it can be very confusing to know how to react when your children are defying your wishes or agenda.
The key is to not getting sucked into the old instinct to grab for power. Kids aren't grabbing for dominance (unless that has been modeled), they are struggling to think clearly or over tired or over hungry or have a need they don't know how to express.
When defiance shows up, remember not to seek compliance, and instead to seek connection. Get curious about what they are needing and use a spirit of compassion to work with your child instead of against them.
.webp){kind=avatar}
In this video, you'll learn about the myth of parental control, and how focusing on controlling our own behavior rather than our children's behavior can lead to a more secure attachment relationship and greater self-control in our children.
.webp){kind=avatar}
In this video, you'll learn that how you live is the biggest teaching tool in your toolkit, as humans are wired to learn through watching and imitating, rather than through directions or instructions.
.webp){kind=avatar}
Avoid focusing too much on fairness when teaching kids, as it can create a belief that good behavior is always rewarded and bad behavior is always punished, leading to the dangerous belief that they deserve any trauma they experience, instead use relational motivation to guide them towards making good choices.
%402x.svg){kind=icon}