With all of the various forms of parenting advice out there it can be overwhelming to know what you're supposed to do in tricky moments.
Here is a breakdown of 4 different parenting mindsets to help you identify choices based on your actual parenting goals.
1. Power and control mindset "my job is to teach you to submit"
2. Behavioral mindset "my job is to teach you how to act"
3. Permissive mindset "my job is to make you feel comfortable"
4. Attachment mindset "my job is to be a secure base and a safe haven for you to use as I guide you as you grow and learn about the world"
Learn why suggesting activities to a bored child may not be effective as it triggers a stress response in their brain, and instead, how to hold space for their emotional discomfort so they can reconnect with their executive functioning skills in this informative video.
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In this video, learn why it's important to focus on soothing and supporting kids' emotions before trying to teach them, as strong emotions take energy away from the brain's thinking and processing areas, and how you can use co-regulation and language to help them grow once they've calmed down. Remember to "Connect before you correct," as Dr. Karyn Purvis said.
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Avoid focusing too much on fairness when teaching kids, as it can create a belief that good behavior is always rewarded and bad behavior is always punished, leading to the dangerous belief that they deserve any trauma they experience, instead use relational motivation to guide them towards making good choices.
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