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My sweet mama did something amazing. She realized from her own attachment traumas, she could break the cycle.
One of the ways she did that was by breaking the cycle of guilt and control.
When she told me "you don't owe me anything" she was releasing me from generations of abuse.
And do you know what happens when you love someone with open arms and open hands? They feel loved. And they openly return that love to you.
When she had a memory emergency last year, absolutely 0% of me felt burdened. I held her hand and gently cared for her as she lay confused and disoriented in the hospital.
The attachment system doesn't need guilt. In fact, guilt gets in the way of true unfettered gratitude and generosity that comes from secure attachment.
As parents, we want to protect our children from harm, but threats of violence may not be the best way to do so. Instead, we can be a refuge and a barrier for our children, offering comfort and support in times of need.
In this video, the speaker discusses how our culture tends to attribute behaviors and motivations to people's private parts, and proposes the term "Overgenitalization" to help us understand that violence and nurture do not come from a person's reproductive body parts, but rather from the environments and social experiences they are raised in.
In this insightful video, you'll learn why your children aren't reflections of you, but rather a reflection of the things you haven't yet accepted about yourself, and discover helpful strategies for dealing with triggers related to your child's behavior.