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Intention and impact are two different things.
You can tell someone about how their actions or inactions impacted you, but the authority over what their intentions were belongs to them.
If you don't trust their explanation of their intentions, it might be time to move on to someone you do trust. Or evaluate when you learned to always be skeptical of people's intentions towards you and separate that trauma from the present security.
In this video, learn about the risk of relapse for individuals who have been abusive in the past, and the confusion surrounding whether someone has truly changed, as well as the importance of recognizing true change, moving on, and being aware of the signs of abuse.
Supporting a trauma survivor's felt safety means being present with empathy and patience, providing a space of safety to help calm their dysregulation and offer them a secure and grounding attachment relationship.
Learn how contempt in relationships often stems from shame and how to address the root cause of contempt by addressing the underlying shame through vulnerability and open communication with your partner or attachment figures in this insightful and practical video.