I wish we didn't have to deal with bullying. I am hoping that if I run my mouth enough on the internet eventually we will see a decrease in bullying because we will see an increase in children getting what they need from their parents.
BUT. Even if we all gave our children secure emotional support, kids go through stages where they test relational boundaries and are crappy to each other.
SO. We must help our littles develop the skills necessary to stand up and set boundaries when other kids or grown ups are being bulls.
Educating them about bullying and maltreatment is good, but what's even better, is when you model how to do it.
Did your stomach just drop? Mine too. It's hard to stand up to people who are bullying us or just being generally rude and disrespectful to us. But our kids need us to. They need to see it can be done clearly and without violence. They need to see that we are capable of it so that they don't feel responsible to protect us, or protect their pain from us in fear of burdening us.
Who could you practice standing up to in front of your child? Or what boundaries could they see you draw even though the other person doesn't want you to?
If you are struggling with how to do this, write in the comments, and then take good care of each other there with ideas and encouragement.
Learn how to shift the vibe of your home environment and improve your connection with your children by finding ways to say "yes" instead of always resorting to "no" in this insightful video on parental co-regulation and relational reactivity.
Learn why idealization can lead to grandiose pressure and the dangers of love bombing in this insightful video on building trust and secure attachment in relationships.
Learn the power of modeling self-compassion to your kids, as it inspires authenticity and problem-solving, and helps them develop their own self-treatment based on how they see you treat yourself.
%402x.svg){kind=icon}