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One of the most important skills we give our children is the ability to apologize and repair in a relationship when something they have done (or not done) effects someone else.
Like most other things, they learn this primarily by watching what you model.
Kids need to see adults apologize and take ownership of the impact of their actions with these two important elements:
1. The absence of shame. If we enter shame when we apologize we take away the focus on the other person's pain or upset.
2. The presence of true understanding of what the other person felt or experienced as a result of our actions or inactions.
Good luck out there parents! If you're anything like me there are MANY opportunities every day to model apologizing ..š
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In this video, you'll learn how to guide children when they have hurt someone, by connecting with them about their feelings, modeling empathy for the person impacted, and collaborating with them to make repairs, as empathy is learned through receiving empathy and being surrounded by empathetic models.
The difference between consequences and punishment is important to understand, as consequences are the natural outcome of an action and necessary for learning, while punishments are intentional pain inflicted to control behavior, which can damage the parent-child relationship and hinder a child's growth towards internal security.
Learn how to overcome compassion fatigue and repair your relationship with your kids by owning your failure, offering delayed compassion, and starting the dance of connection again in this powerful video.