1.
Your kids NEED you to connect with the adults in your life.
I know this can seem the opposite when they cling to your leg as you leave them with a babysitter for an evening night out with your partner or with your friends.
But it is vital to their health. Because you are their most influential model on these two things:
1. How they should treat others
2. How others should treat them
So they are watching you and looking for a template on close mature relationships. You can't care for them fully without also caring for your own attachment needs.
Esp because you will unconsciously expect them to meet your needs if you aren't doing it yourself.
You deserve close, caring spaces to be given love with the other adults in your life, and so does your partner or close friends.
investing in your adult relationships IS investing in your kids.
In this video, you'll learn that hovering over our kids to protect them is not the best form of protection, as they need us to be connected with them so they can come to us as a refuge, and that the best protection we can offer them is connection.
Avoid focusing too much on fairness when teaching kids, as it can create a belief that good behavior is always rewarded and bad behavior is always punished, leading to the dangerous belief that they deserve any trauma they experience, instead use relational motivation to guide them towards making good choices.
In this video, the speaker reflects on how our mental and emotional states can impact our decision-making, and emphasizes the importance of offering compassion and understanding to both ourselves and others, particularly in times of stress, anxiety, and transition.