When we are asking our children to change their behavior or understand the impact of their behavior we are creating neural patterns for them.
If we use punishment we are creating shame, fear and pain connections to the experience of being asked to change or grow.
These neural networks then get activated in other relationships making it hard to be receptive to change or to feedback from people in our lives.
When we use teaching focused methods instead of control focused methods our children can learn without feeling yucky about growth.
Gentle teaching doesn't make weaker adults, it makes calmer more centered adults.
Check out "no drama discipline" by Dan Siegel , or peaceful parent happy kids by Dr Laura Markum for ideas on how to teach without punishment
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In this video, the speaker discusses how our culture tends to attribute behaviors and motivations to people's private parts, and proposes the term "Overgenitalization" to help us understand that violence and nurture do not come from a person's reproductive body parts, but rather from the environments and social experiences they are raised in.
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In this video, the speaker shares how their mother broke the cycle of attachment trauma by letting go of guilt and control, leading to a loving and secure relationship that transcended generations of abuse.
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In this video, learn three practical tips for helping children learn honesty, including recognizing and managing your own anxiety, understanding that lying is normal and has a range of nuances, and creating an environment of empathy and understanding for messiness.
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