Lots of folks ask me about time outs...
My answer is based on attachment research (predictable meš).
Taking breaks is hugely important to help our brains reset when we are dysregulated. So YES to the reset and break part of a time out.
But we're adding to their dysregulation if we are trying to teach them by isolating them with shame or pain as a lesson.
Our nervous systems do best when we have calm people lovingly helping us to reset. (co-regulation).
The lesson we want them to learn is "our bodies need breaks sometimes to calm down so our brains can calmly make good safe choices.
Works for marriages too!
ā
Discover evidence-based techniques for helping children process traumatic events in a healthy way, including encouraging them to tell their story and avoiding avoidance, with guidance from expert Dr. Dan Siegel and clinical experience.
Learn why suggesting activities to a bored child may not be effective as it triggers a stress response in their brain, and instead, how to hold space for their emotional discomfort so they can reconnect with their executive functioning skills in this informative video.
.webp){kind=avatar}
This video offers guidance on how parents can help their kids learn about conflict resolution through setting boundaries and offering compassion towards both parties, emphasizing the importance of safety and boundaries, effective communication, and moving to repair in conflict situations.
%402x.svg){kind=icon}